Our family and the locals here have this habit — or rather, tradition — of calling a baby’s one-month old birthday as the baby’s “full moon”, and today is that day for Ezra. I was wondering what was going on when my husband and in-laws came home this afternoon with an armful of fresh food ready to be cooked, before realizing what day it was today.

It’s going to be a small celebration with just the family members. Tomorrow will be our big family trip to Tuaran, my hometown. Apparently, my in-laws have never been there, and it was something I didn’t find out until a few weeks ago. Oh well.

By the way, someone dropped me an e-mail today saying how cool Ezra’s name was (yeah, I know!). I couldn’t have done it without the Web and the myriads of site dedicated to baby boys names as well as girl. Thank God for the Internet!

Ezra is 10 days old today, and all’s well in the Dony household. His jaundice is clearing off, and his umbilical stub fell off on the seventh day. So far, he’s gained a little more than 0.1 kg from what we found out through our follow-up visit to the pediatrician last Thursday.

One issue I’m having with this little one is his feeding habit. Since I’ve never had this issue with Eric and Joel before, I was slightly baffled at first that Ezra can’t finish his feed at one go. He kept falling asleep halfway through, so I usually end up spending time feeding him for at least 20 to 40 minutes at a time. I suppose, due to that, he has a little problem letting out gas, and that makes him uncomfortable at times.

But really, they are more of an inconvenience than something I would worry about. At least he can finish 2 ml every two to three hours, as well as wet his diapers and stools frequently. I’m also using the tried and true method of rubbing his tummy with a little eucalyptus oil and that made him pass gas better.

I’m eager to see how he will be like in a month’s time!

I found this article from BabyCenter.com, one of the web sites I frequently visit for tips on parenting and child care. Basically the seven fears listed in the article were:

1. Security fears
2. Performance fears
3. Paternity fears
4. Mortality fears
5. Fear for your spouse’s or child’s health
6. Relationship fears — Quote: “Men often fear that their wife will love the baby more than anyone on earth — and exclude them from that intimate relationship.”
7. Fears of “women’s medicine”

I find that relationship fears are especially true and no less an uncommon occurrence that fathers faced. I personally think that more often than not, the wives may exclude their husbands on purpose from getting close with the babies, as a way of “punishing” the husband.

During the earlier years when I had Eric, I would look at my husband and feel remorse that he can still get away with doing what he had always been doing before we got married, such as going out for badminton games in the evening, or spending time with his friends and cousins during the weekends (even spending the nights there), while I was stuck, always at home having to bear my son’s wailing and having more than the usual house work to do after a tiring day at work. So yeah, there were times when my husband would want to play with our son and I simply stopped him and say, “Stop disturbing him, or he’ll get cranky and I’ll have to deal with him crying again.” The good thing is that I have learned to let go of my bitterness over those time, and accept the fact that things aren’t the same for me as a wife and mother, that there are things that I simply can’t do anymore. It’s a matter of accepting the changes in my life, however frustrating it may be, and focus more on the positive and how I can benefit on what’s good around me.